Baby

I remember when Ryder was a baby I couldnt wait for him to start eating baby food. It was like a countdown for me. Once the three month mark hit I was like "only two more weeks until he can eat sweet potatoes!" WHAT. 

I feel like I was constantly thinking of the next stage with Ryder and wishing his first two years away. When will he start crawling? When will he start walking? When will he be able to hold his own bottle? When will he sleep through the night? When will he potty train? When will he really start talking? Hurry up and grow up.

 Even now it's hard for me to not have that mentality with him. When its your first child it doesnt matter if they are 5 months old or 5 years old, for that first born for the rest of their lives you are a "first time mom". I am a first time mom of a five year old. I have NO FREAKING CLUE when this annoying "silly" stage will end (God, please can it be soon?). I have no idea when he will start getting better about eating, or when he will learn to tie his shoes (now I guess?? I dont know. Should I be working on that? All of his shoes are slip on or velcro though, sooooo......). I don't have any past experience to tell me when phases and stages will end, what to be firm on and what to just let slide under the rug--it's no big deal, it'll pass. I am blindly going about raising an elementary aged son and just hoping and praying I am not making too many mistakes. It sucks not being able to see the other side of the coin. 

But I can see the other side of the coin with Finn. I know all too well that babies eating solid food isn't as exciting as I thought it would be. Remember how their crap used to not really have that bad of a smell? HA! Kiss those days goodbye. Solid food brings out a stench that will make you cry. Solids can stay away for quite some time with Mr. Finn.

When will he walk? When will he crawl?! HA again! One of the stages in life I have the most pity for with parents is the 12 month mark. The kid is either almost or fully mobile, but has no concept of boundaries. Watching parents chase after overly adventurous one year olds, or attempt to make them sit in their laps in waiting rooms for any extended amount of time makes my stomach hurt. And I know that is going to be me again. AHH!

So, please Finn, don't grow up. Stay little. Keep the little dimples in your hands,  keep curling up like a little roly poly when I pick you up, keep wearing your size one diapers and stay small enough to bathe in the sink. 

I have seen the other side of this coin. Twice. And I have wished away these little baby moments mostly with Ryder, and some with Lucy. But I really just want to enjoy and soak up every single ounce of baby goat noises Finn is churning out. 

He is so awesome.